In the Gospel of Matthew Jesus comforts us with these beautiful words, "Come to me, all of you who are heavily-burdened and weary and I will give you rest for your souls." How ironic it is that in my flurry to celebrate our Lord's birth, refreshment and rest are so absent. There's so much to do - stockings to fill, trees to trim, presents to wrap, people to see - that I feel like a hamster - going and going - exhausting myself and getting nowhere. I want Christmas to be a special time when I pray and wonder that God loved us so much that He came to earth as a helpless baby. I want Christmas to be a time of refreshment when I am drawn closer to God and re-energized to serve Him. Unfortunately, the pressures of the season make it difficult to find time to relax and be with the One whose birthday it is.

I love holidays! I enjoy crafting and cooking. I relish all the color, festivities, excitement, and special events. In fact, I couldn't go to sleep Thanksgiving night for trying to plan all the things I simply must do this Christmas: the cards to send, the carols to sing. Will this be my year to finally make a goose with a flaming pudding like in A Christmas Carol? What specials must we watch as a family? When can I take a night to cry over It's a Wonderful Life? Is there any way that we can go hear the Messiah, see the Nutcracker, and watch a Christmas parade all on the same day?

Every year I make a list of Christmas activities I intend to do. And every year MOST never get done. Gingerbread boys remain unbaked, Christmas ornaments unmade, and the Christmas tree skirt with a nativity I have been sewing for five years still only has a star, a cow, and half of Joseph. And now I have children for whom I need to do all the marvelous things that make Christmas a magical time. But as I catch myself beginning to play another holiday round of Beat the Clock, I remind myself of what Christmas really means. At Christmas we celebrate the birth of God's only Son. The God that placed the sun and the moon and the stars in the heavens; the God whose hands carved the mountains and valleys &endash; this Almighty God humbles Himself to become a helpless infant. When I concentrate on the true meaning of Christmas, I am ashamed for thinking how many cookies I bake makes any difference in the quality of Christmas.

I think that December is a tremendously challenging time for women clergy. Church growth experts agree that Christmas provides the best opportunity to reach unchurched and under-churched people. Since we have experienced the life-transforming and overwhelming love of our Savior, we have a passion to see others find the peace and wholeness Jesus Christ offers. Therefore, we plan extra events and special worship services to attract people to come and hear the good news of Jesus Christ. We also know all the pressures, stresses and temptations the season places on those in our churches. Alcoholics are tempted by parties and advertisements offering "holiday spirits. Couples argue over tight finances. Widows and widowers grieve as they are overwhelmed with memories. And even if all is well for those whom we serve, the secular world seems determined to oust Christ from Christmas.

As that great theologian Charlie Brown put it, "Even my dog's gone commercial!" I saw an advertisement that illustrates the false values and materialism that have infected our celebration of Christmas. An attractive woman smiles seductively at a smug male under the caption, "Wise men still bring gold÷and diamonds." The absence of Christ from Christmas is becoming more common. When one cannot see Christ for the constant commercials and material abundance, it is tragic indeed. These cultural messages make it exceedingly difficult for our church members to celebrate a Christian Christmas. And we clergy know all too well that church may be the only place where those we serve hear the true story of Christmas. And yet we also know that our church events compete with so many other activities that people have to do. This time of the year, I feel my sermons must dazzle, the music inspire, and everything be absolutely perfect so that I will not squander this seasonal opportunity for the people I love and serve to grow closer to God.

This pressure for perfection spills over into our homes as well. Women are for the most part the ones who make holidays happen for their families. And who doesn't want to do all within her power create a beautiful wondrous holiday for the ones she loves? Magazines and television fill our minds with advertisements, shows, and articles featuring perfectly decorated homes with perfectly groomed people eating perfect meals -  meals that evidently have no calories because these people remain perfect throughout the holiday season. If I somehow managed to pull off the twenty-dish meal I am being encouraged to make, I can assure you my kitchen would not remain artfully decorated. It wouldn't even be clean! And now that I have two young boys I notice the children in the ads. They eat chocolate fudge or heavily iced cookies and drink "stain forever" red punch without getting anything on themselves or the furniture!

The way to free ourselves from the pressure for perfection is to remember that the only perfect person was the baby in manger and that he came to free us from just such stress and worry and to give us true peace. Jesus instructed us not to worry, and the book of Philippians reminds us, "Do not worry about anything but in prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be known to God, and the peace of God which surpasses all understanding will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus." We can no more work ourselves into the perfect Christmas than we can work our way into the kingdom of heaven. It is not up to us to save people or to grow their faith. We are called to bear witness, and to do this boldly, but God's Spirit does the work of justification and sanctification. Once we have done our best, we need to recall the grace of God's love poured out for us through His only Son and rest in His love. Our Christmases do not have to be perfect either at home or in church.

One of the best ways to slow down and take pressure off ourselves is to worship. During this busy season, we desperately need to pray, to listen to the words of the carols, and spend time with the One whose birthday it is. One of the best spiritual investments I ever made was to purchase Christmas music that inspires me to see the wonder of Jesus' birth. As I rush around town in my car, instead of thinking about all I have to do, I sing and praise God. My car is a mini-sanctuary, a place where I can refocus. With all of the extra driving I do this time of the year, these small blocks of time with God refocus, refresh, and reinvigorate me.

Another way to slow down is to be instructed by the Christian liturgical calendar. Advent is supposed to be a season of preparation, not the holiday celebration. According to the liturgical year, Christmas really begins Christmas Eve, right when clergy schedules are slowing down. In fact, many of us take off from work the week after Christmas. I hope to use Advent season to prepare for the holiday, and the Christmas season to enjoy, experience, wonder and worship. I am planning to spend the last week of December relaxing with family and taking some time alone with God. I hope to play carols and sit by the fire. Or watch the tree and take this slower paced time to visit with friends and do special baking. Remember Christmas Eve is a beginning not a deadline. Let the season linger and let it refresh you for the coming year.

A third way I attempt to keep my Christmas stress-free is to make the activities in which I invest my time Christ-centered. For example, most of my family's decorations have religious themes. I love to make ornaments. Stitching Chrismons is a worshipful experience for me as I meditate on the symbolism and use them as teaching tools for my boys. I also collect manger scenes and let their beauty help re-focus me on Jesus. Beloved ornaments provide opportunities to tell stories of Christmas memories and to remember loved ones who are now with Christ. Reading Christmas stories, especially children's books on the birth of Jesus, is another family activity I cherish. Our family worships around the supper table - just singing a carol or saying a Scripture verse after our blessing. It isn't elaborate, but it is a special time. These small reminders of Jesus help me to stay focused and keep me close to the Lord so that I can handle all the other demands of the season.

Another tactic which takes off pressure in December is to do "traditional holiday" activities throughout the year. Many Christmas projects adapt well to other holidays. My boys and I bake cookies and treats all during the year &endash; especially on holidays that have no church demands such as Valentine's Day or Fourth of July. It's so much more enjoyable for me and for them. For several years I hosted a Christmas drop-in for our church. It took days to prepare the food and decorate the house and keep everything clean. I decided it was too much, but still wanted to open our home to our congregation. My husband and I decided to do a Halloween drop-in. We offer a safe, Christ-centered place to come after trick-or &endash;treating. How nice it is to enjoy having a party rather than frantically trying to cross it off a "to do" list! An added bonus is that everyone has fewer obligations at that time of the year, so more people can come. As a mother, I want to make Christmas special for my little ones, but I am gradually coming to see that if everyday is a little special, Christmas need not be such a big production.

Lastly, remember that for Christians, Christmas is the second holiest time of the year. It is so important for us to recall what that baby in the manger came to do. The cross overshadows the cradle. God loved us enough to leave the splendor of heaven and take on human form. He suffered and died so that we might have abundant and eternal life. He rose from the dead and ascended into heaven where he loves us, cares for us, and prays for us. Christmas only has meaning if it reminds us of all the love that God has poured out for us in Christ Jesus. And that boundless love is not only shown at Christmas, but in each moment of our lives. Christmas is about glorifying God and we have our entire ministries, our entire lives to do this. So let us be faithful and let us rejoice that in the words of John, "From His fullness, we have received grace upon grace." And His grace is indeed sufficient to sustain us in this season and every day. I wish you the most blessed of Christmases. To God be the glory!

Rev. Tracie Mayes Stewart is a life-long Presbyterian from the Carolinas. She graduated from Davidson College and then attended Union Theological Seminary in Richmond, Virginia. There she met her husband, Brian, who is also ordained in the PCUSA. Tracie was awarded the Lydian Scholarship, a scholarship that is given to a female seminarian through NPWL.. Tracie and her husband started a new Presbyterian Church in Jackson, Tennessee. Last year they returned home to North Carolina so that Brian could start another new church. Tracie is the mother of two boys, Brian Alexander, 5, and William James, 2. She serves part -time as Parish Associate for Christian Education at the First Presbyterian Church in Statesville, North Carolina. Tracie co-authored NPWL's Bible Study Resource on the Holy Spirit, Windwork, and is active in NPWL.